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Hotty from History 31 Jean Nicolas Arthur Rimbaud (20 October 1854 10 November 1891)

Poor little Rimbaud was abandonded by his daddy and bought up by his mother, a strict Catholic. It does seem to be a hallmark of hotties from history: somewhere down the line they will be betrayed and abandoned. One of his teachers said about him: He has eyes and a smile which I do not like. He will come to a bad end. In any case, nothing banal will germinate in that head. He will be the genius for good or evil! Damn, I wish teachers still did school reports as cool as this! Also, his stuffy school teacher Mr Perette might not have liked them, and his lover Verlaine might have discribed them as “disturbing pale blue but they are so striking they seem to be a beautiful god given reflection of his artistic brilliance. Like a little divine warning sign: man has incredible eyes. He is a genius and therefore probably a fuckwit did a lot of running away. He ran away to Paris, Belgium and Brussels. One time he tried to get to Paris without paying the full price and got sent to prison. Oh, to have been the lucky chap who shared his cell! I bet he had supremely interesting conversation. Apparently he was rude and untidy. They had a tumultuous relationship, what with Verlaine being married with a child, but I bet they had splendidly interesting conversations. At the height of their relationship, they spent some time living in Soho, London. He later became a bit of an adventurist and did a lot of travelling, but I like to think that our very own Soho was his top spot to be was shot in the wrist by Verlaine who was in a jealous rage. Our hotties do tend to have particularly dramatic love lives and artists today are probably quite fortunate that pistols and revolvers are not so readily available as they were back then! He died before the age of fourty spendidly handsome, quite isolated, and not particularly well loved. Many, many years later, he was depicted in a film by Leonardo di Caprio. French, handsome of a rustic and wily beauty with an indolently daring attitude and not forgetting of course, a very good poet. Georgia

Finally I free! Released from the shackles of my History A Level. To mark my sad departure from my historical I bringeth thee this hotty, who I spent 2 hours writing about in beastly exam conditions.

Hotty from History 30 Mary Stuart (1542 1587)

Mary Stuart, also known as Mary Queen of Scots (obviously stolen from Mary Portas), had probably the most dysfunctional life belonging to a British monarch ever. Born to Scottish and French royalty, Mary was married to the Dauphin of France, yet through his sudden and untimely death, she fled to Scotland, where her French mother, Mary of Guise, acted as regent for her daughter. She was known for her pursuit of merriment and sense of adventure, and she could perform feats of endurance on horseback, feats that would have killed an average man. An image of a queen riding a horse through the rugged Scottish highlands is supremely romantic, and thus also suggests she had excellent thighs.

Her marriage to Lord Darnley was controversial, because it alarmed Elizabeth, as the marriage strengthened her claim to the English throne, also it has been said that Darnley was a raging homosexual, plagued with jealousy, and a drunk. When he suspected of an affair between his wife and her private secretary, David Rizzio, he brutally murdered Rizzio and his supporters in front of Mary. Poor Mary yet in early 1567, Lord Darnely was found mysteriously strangled in his garden, his house blown to pieces by gunpowder. Fateful karma?

Mary resulting life was rather dull, she never achieved real power, and spent most of her adult life in captivity after unsucessfully seeking refuge in England and after 9 years of house arrest, she was executed.

Antonin is perhaps best known for being a theatre practitioner but it is his writing which is truly spectacular. Reading it, you can see why people worried about his mental health. What I love about Artaud is that he excuses himself of all his sins by describing the waking world as hell. He not so terribly far off.

Antonin was basically a drug addict. This in itself isn attractive but he did have a pretty sound reason to be so: he wasn exactly a fan of everyday waking life. I think he was talking about the escape that drugs allowed him when he said long as we have failed to eliminate any of the causes of human despair, we do not have the right to try to eliminate those means by which man tries to cleanse himself of despair. Pretty sound reasoning there, Artaud. Not sure it would sit very well with angry and concerned parents in this modern age, but it would be worth a try. His dramatic Manifesto, Theatre of Cruelty, was a complete flop when it was originally released. This happens to a lot of great things: Van Gogh art, Withnail and I, that strange contraption they called flying machine It hardly a hugely popular theatrical discipline now, but it is believed that Artaud was the first practitioner to have theatre performed in the round. In his life, he had not been obsessed by suicide, although he did say that conversation with a psychiatrist me want to hang myself, realizing that I would not be able to cut his throat Oh, Artaud. He has an insight into literally everything one might want a hotty to know about. And, it would seem, Artaud did not have any particularly memorable love affairs: it is times like these that I wish I could go back in time and offer myself as a muse! Is that a little bit wrong? Probably. Oh well!Tragedy on the stage is no longer enough for me, I shall bring it into my own lifeHotty from History 28 Lord Alfred Bruce Douglas (22 October 1870 20 March 1945)

Known far and wide as Bosie, this chap is long overdue for introduction into our hotty hall of fame.

He was born into a wealthy but rather eccentric noble family. His uncle Lord James Douglas fell in love with his own twin sister, became an alcoholic when she married and eventually committed suicide. Other uncles included one who died while climbing the Matterhorn and another who became a priest. His aunt (the aforementioned twin sister) Lady Florence Douglas was a thoroughly good influence on young Bosie however, being a feminist, suffragette and war correspondent during the Boer War. However, he spent all his time writing for the college newspaper and editing racy novels, so dropped out without earning a degree. His own brother died in mysterious cicumstances after reputedly having an affair with the Prime Minister, Lord Roseberry. To appear to the public, many of these chaps and flopsies married, only to have illicit affairs with one another. Bosie and Oscar were in a constant cycle of messy break up and passionate reconciliation, and all the while Bosie spent Wilde money on rent boys and gambling. When Queensberry threatened to cut off Bosie allowance and inheritance, Bosie replied with a postcard saying only a funny little man you are He also refused to dispose of letters and photos of himself and Oscar, which were later used as evidence of Wilde homosexuality Amazingly it wasn Queensberry who started the lawsuit, but Wilde (persuaded by Bosie) who had his father arrested for having the audacity of calling Wilde a homosexual. She started a fashion at the Slade of wearing deeply unfashionable clothes and having pudding bowl haircuts. Despite this aesthetic mishap, she managed to engage in romantic liasions with a number of other painters. Artists Christopher Nevinson and Mark Gertler both fell in love with her, and although she behaved in a provocative manner she refused to choose between them or have a sexual relationship with either of them. A modern translation of this might be that she was an expert tease, for which I salute her. She was closely associated with the Bloomsbury group, and painted portraits of many members. When he made a sexual pass at her, she retaliated by going into his room at night with the intention of cutting off his prized red beard. Instead, he woke up and she became suddenly enamoured of him. It is a well known and terribly sad fact that it is very easy to fall in love with brilliant gay men, only to have to resign to the fact that they could only ever love you as a friend. Dora also had the tendency to fall in love with the same men as Scrachey. How frustrating!! However, it wasn all bad. She married one of Scrachey lovers, Ralph Partridge, and the three of them lived together in a hot tangle of bohemian limbs. Later she embarked on an affair with a Parisian model, novelist and former Slade art student Julia Scrachey who also happened to be Lytton niece. It seems Dora thrived on complicated relationships! Both women were total hotties, so, I don blame her! Eventually, weeks before her thirty ninth birthday, Dora shot herself. Lytton had died of stomach cancer and it would seem that Dora couldn bear life without him. How terribly romantic and deeply tragic. Carrington was played by Emma Thompson in a film about her life. Emma Thompson is such a special sort of hotty, who is seductive because of her superior talent as well as her prescence on stage and screen, which seems to reflect the unique appeal of Dora. Georgia

Hotty from History 26 Giacomo Girolamo Casanova de Seingalt (April 2, 1725 June 4, 1798)

Why he qualifies (and so spectacularly!)

He was a suprisingly studious hotty, and studied moral philosophy, chemistry, and mathematics, as well as being keenly interested in medicine. However, he wasn a total swot whilst at University (which he attended from the age of 12 17!) he also got into gambling and generated a lot of debt. Okay there is something incredibly weird about that, but also, impressive! Lucky Casanova managed to tick off one of the most popular modern sexual fantasies before it was even a fashion. And I imagine Nanetta and Maria Savorgnan were probably hotter than The Veronicas. He was a very witty man, which probably helped him to get the large majority of women he bedded into One of his most perceptive insights was on love and anger “To reason rightly one must be neither in love nor in anger; for those two passions reduce us to the level of animals; and unfortunately we are never so much inclined to reason as when we are agitated by one or the other of them. well as being a superior shag, Casanova also committed a number of political crimes. This shouldn be attractive but it basically is rebel and a rogue generally manages to set the pulse racing more than a boring old goody two shoesHe has been depicted in film form by both David Tennant and Heath Ledger, a delectable Scot and a delicious (but very sadly dead) Australian. I hereby challenge the contributors (and indeed the followers) of hottiesfromhistory to call out Girolamo Casanova de Seingalt!! next time they achieve an orgasm, in honour of our 26th hotty. Scott Fitzgerald BUT she was an absolute hotty in her own way! She once said don want to live I want to love first, and live incidentally. She was a talented lady full to the brim with passion, and passion is generally a hotty attribute. She was an icon of the 1920s. She practised endlessly and to exhaustion. This is of course very sad, but also incredibly beautiful, romantic and poetic. Whilst there Zelda wrote an incredibly poorly recieved novel called Save Me the Waltz. F. Well, little did Scott know that decades later Zelda would be portrayed by Keira Knightley in a film about their marriage. And who will Scott be played by? That hasn even been decided yet. Zelda is the real hotty here!!She eventually burnt to death in a fire at the age of 48. Okay, so that in itself is terribly tragic, but also exciting. And again, very poetic. Makes for a good film. That always a good sign of a hotty: that their life would translate into a very good film. She was a feminist icon in the 70s because of the repressive nature of her marriage to F. Scott Fitzgerald. Being an icon of the Jazz age and later an icon of Women Lib is pretty awesome. And being a HOT icon of feminism? Even better! Georgia

Hotty from History 24 Sir Walter Raleigh

During my revision for my impending A Level History exam, I have come to the conclusion that the Tudors was not the best era for hotties. I struggled whilst rifling through my numerous books to find a hotty,
timberland uk jobs Hotties from History
yet everyone looks pretty dowdy in their portraits; and i was tempted to post Elizabeth I, yet it seemed like she had a slight case of vagina dentata.